Tough Questions…

Even as wisdom often comes from the mouths of babes, so does it often come from the mouths of old people. The golden rule is to test everything in the light of reason and experience, no matter from where it comes.  – Gandhi

There is hardly a more accurate, yet more disregarded quote than this…especially the first part.  In fact, I would venture to guess, that many are only familiar with the first part of the quote.  Today’s young people have an awful lot of wisdom and insight to share, but all to often, we fail to recognize that.  We do not listen to what they have to say, and when we do listen, we don’t take the time to truly pay attention.  Did you read that carefully?  I said “we” because I am just as guilty as anyone else in this, but every now and then one of my “kids” says something that truly shocks me and makes me think.

For some reason, the older generations in this country seem to think that they have the “monopoly on good ideas.”  It is a phrase I heard at a conference this past June, but it was in reference to geography, not age.  I think it applies in this situation just as well, if not better.  But because younger generations don’t necessarily have the experience or knowledge, they are often discounted or told to”shush.”  But I have learned something in my time working with my kids…they ask hard, thoughtful, shocking, painful, honest, and amazing questions.  They ask questions that make me shudder, gasp, blush, and feel pain, and I want to share some of the questions I have has some of my kids ask me in the last year, and I want you to listen to the wisdom they are striving to find and that they may already have.

1)  I had one of my kids ask me why it is ok for his/her parent to have sex with someone they are not married to, but the teen is not supposed to?  Listen to not only the wisdom, but the social awareness in that question.  This student is consciously aware of social pressures and expectations, concerned with them, but also confused by the actions of a role model.  This is a question from someone who is thinking deeply.

2)  Another of my kids asked me this past June why “if most of the old-school people who made big changes to the church were young, why are most of our church leaders old?”  Wow right?  Martin Luther was 33 years old when he posted his 95 Theses.  John Wesley was in his early 30′s when he began a ministry that would influence an enormous chunk of the Christian world.  At the young age of 26 Pope John Paul II started his journey to becoming one of the most beloved and influential figures in Catholic history.  But according to a 2010 United Methodist report, the average age of clergy in the UMC is 55, and over half of the church elders are between 55 and 72 years old.  The average age of a Catholic priest is 56 years old, and a majority of Lutheran pastors are over 49 years old.  I understand that sometimes it takes a while to “earn your stripes,” but how often do those stripes wear out good young leaders?

3)  One of the favorite questions I have heard came from a middle school student at camp this month.  He asked why “if we are supposed to be ‘one body’ why are there denominations in Christianity?”  I had a hard time explaining to him the answer when he read to me the dictionary definition of “denomination” and I heard words like “division,” “separation,” “grouping,” and “individual.”  In a faith where we are supposed to be “one body,” denominations make it hard to explain why we are not.

4)  This last question breaks my heart, and is one I heard not too awful long ago.  One of my kids was having a rough day, and as we were chatting on Facebook, my student asked me “why are there so many bad Christians?”  Ouch, but that was just the beginning.  This young person asked “if it ok to be a ‘bad Christian’ why can’t gays be Christians?  (There I did it…and it scares the hell out of me, but I opened Pandora’s Box)  I don’t have an answer for that.

I don’t know how to respond to these questions.  I don’t have good answers for some of these tough questions, and if our kids are asking them today, isn’t that a pretty good indication that they are thinking?  That maybe they are more aware than we think?   That maybe they are more invested in their faith than originally thought?  The challenge now comes in finding answers to some of these puzzling questions…answers that encourage our young thinkers to continue to explore and grow…not answers that crush and discourage.

1 Timothy 4:12
¹² Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.

I love these tough questions.  They challenge me, make me think, force me to consider things outside of what I normally would.  I just hope I never grow calloused to their questions.  Because as long as they are asking questions, they are learning, growing…becoming leaders.

1 Timothy 4:12
¹² Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.

One Love
One God
One Way

Jason

The Truth in Lies…

Disclaimer:  The following blog post is both tongue in cheek and curious at the same time.  Please don’t take too seriously.

I am not going to lie…it has been a long time since I worked on a blog post…or is that a lie.

I am actually quite good at lying.  I am confident, I am quick witted, I am good at thinking on my feet.  All of those traits combine to make me a pretty good liar.  But one moment in my lying life stands out.  One weekend my parents left for a quick trip and instructed me not to take the Explorer anywhere except for an emergency.  Well it turned out that my emergency was my lack of pizza.  When they returned home, they asked if I had driven the Explorer, I said “no.”  Man I was dumb.  They had recorded the mileage, and I was busted.  My punishment was epic.  As a senior in high school I had to ride my bike to school (two miles each way on a gravel road, past a mean German Shepherd) for the first semester.  If I had told the truth, my punishment would have been less extreme, but I chose to lie.  It is the last time I can remember lying to my parents.

But that is not to say that is the last time I have lied.  I am a fan of a current television show called Lie to Me.  I have referred to this show previously in my blog post when talking about personal gifts.  But this post is different.  Every day I deal with people  who insist on lying to me even though they are terrible at it.  Every day I logically deal with their lies and explain to them why their lies are not effective nor necessary.  It drives them crazy that I have learned how to read them and discern their truth telling.

This whole situation leads me to one question…is it necessary to ever lie?  I want genuine feedback on this.  I will share this blog on Facebook, Twitter, and online, so I expect some responses.  As I re-watched episode one of Lie to Me, I watched as a “senator” lied about his interactions with a young prostitute, not because he was having intimate relations with her, but because she was his “long lost daughter.”  This is an extreme case, but it piqued my curiosity.  Is it every acceptable to lie?

As stated before, I am pretty good at it.  I have spent much of my last 10 years watching and learning from a variety of people what lying looks like.  But I often question if this is a skill one should cultivate.  I have walked through the straw market in Nassau, Bahamas and told a vendor that all I had was $10 when I really was carrying more than $500 in cash.  I have also looked at a parent and told him/her that their child was an “absolute blessing” to the class.  Neither were particularly accurate, but does that make them any less valid or acceptable.

This is a HUGE “Grey area” issue with me.  After having to have Marcus give me rides to sporting events and practices my senior year, I have never lied to my parents.  At the same time, I have also caused them some pain that could have been spared had I lied.  Was it right that I should spare them?  I vividly remember several times my freshman year at college where my mom would ask questions.   I was honest…brutally so.  I told her every gory detail, and she was shocked.  She didn’t want to know, but was glad I told her the truth.  Was this a mistake?

My struggle intensified when I became a Christian.  There is no lying to God.  He always knows the truth.  This is totally cool, and totally unnerving at the same time.  Before I was a Christian, I could share the “truth” with anyone I wanted to and feel good about it.  But after Jesus saved me, I began to realize that my Savior knew every (extremely) dirty little secret.  He knew every beer, wayward glance, half-truth, lustful thought, and outright lie.  He knew everything!

So I sit here continuing to struggle with the question of whether or not telling “the whole truth and nothing but the truth,”  is always the best option.  I also wonder why more people can’t seem to tell truth from lies.

Thanks for reading and your feedback.

May God’s Son always shine warmly upon you.

Jason

Life on the Mountain Top…

I just got back from one of the most wonderful weeks I have had in a very long time.  For the first time in my life, I was a camper at a church camp.  Actually I was a counselor, but I had never been to any sort of camp before, much less a church camp.  My friend Andy (director of Wesley Acres) called me up and asked me to serve as a counselor at the Waves of Fun North camp in North Dakota.  So I rolled into camp last week with high hopes and no expectations to work with three adults I had never met in my life, and minister to fifteen middle school students who had no idea who I was.  Sounds like an EPICALLY good time right?  It was…and more.

We canoed, swam, kayaked.  We worshiped, sang, fellowshipped.  We goofed off, pulled pranks, and caused a little trouble.  We hugged, connected, and cried.  I have been working with students and youth for the vast majority of my adult life, and I have rarely experienced anything like camp this past week.  It was an emotional, social, and spiritual mountain top experience, and when I had to come home today, I tumbled down hardcore.  I am a sap.  As I have grown in my faith, it seems that I have grown more emotional, and the five-hour drive back from Wesley Acres offered me way more time than I wanted to reflect on how much going back to the real world sucks.  I thought about my three co-counselors and how amazing it was to work with and learn from them.  I thought about all of the unreal youth I got to play with (because I will never ever tell you that what I did at camp was work).  I thought about the deep discussions.  I thought about the crazy jokes.  I thought about the hugs.  I thought about all of the love I saw shared among campers, counselors and staff.  And as I drove home today and wished that it never had to end, I realized that I can’t live on the mountain top.

You see, the mountain top is a pinnacle.  It is a high point in one’s life, and much like a drug, if you stay high for too long, you build up a tolerance and need a “higher high” to get the same effect.  But that is really one a very small part of why it is impossible to live on the mountain top I think.  I think that those mountain top experiences are meant to give us glimpses of what heaven could be like.  Matthew 17 and Mark and Luke 9 all refer to the Transfiguration of Jesus.  In those gospels, Jesus takes several of his disciples with him to the top of a mountain where he visits with the deceased Moses and Elijah.  The experience is so powerful and amazing that the disciples do not want to return.  They want to build tents for the three big guys and hang out for a while, but Jesus instructed them to go down the mountain.

In the same way the disciples had to come back down, so do we.  We hate it, just like they did.  It bums us out.  We get depressed, but in the end it is necessary for a couple of reasons.  First of all, I don’t think we deserve to live on the mountain top yet.  We are a fallen people.  We are sinners.  In my opinion, those mountain top experiences are gifts from God to help encourage us in our walk through this fallen world.  He uses them to help keep us going, or to help move us past roadblocks in our spiritual lives.  Second, when Jesus sent his disciples back down the mountain, he gave them specific instructions not to tell anyone until He had risen again.  He didn’t tell them NOT to share…He just said to wait a bit.  I think God wants us to share our mountain top experiences with others.  He wants us to use those encouraging times to help encourage others, and if we stay at the top, we miss the people who need that encouragement the most.

Our final topic of study at camp was on John 15 and Jesus’ ultimate command.  We talked through how all Jesus really wants is to be our friends.  And all we have to do to be His friend, is to follow his command(s).  “Love each other.”  And as I drove home today, back to the real world, I realized that it is kind of hard to love the people who need it the most if you are camped out on the mountain top.  Jesus doesn’t want us to live on the mountain top because He needs us to be spreading the Love in the valleys and plains.  We are, after all, His hands and feet.

If Jesus can come to Earth from Heaven, live with us and die for us, the least we can do is come down from the mountain and share the gifts we have been given.  Are you trying to live on the mountain top?  Or are you bringing the Good News back down to share with the rest of God’s children?

May your mountain top experiences prove as amazing and fruitful as mine.

Jason

One Love
One God
One Way

For more information on Wesley Acres Camp and Retreat Center click the link or check them out on Facebook.

The Art of Being the Bad Guy…

In the past several months, and indeed for most of my adult life, I have been faced with the fact that no one likes being the bad guy.  People don’t like enforcing rules, taking a stand, or saying “no.”  They want to be friendly and liked, and most of all, for most, being the bad guy is simply too much work.  People would rather say “yes” than risk not being liked.  Many would rather do it themselves than take the time and effort to teach someone how to.  And for way too many, rules are too much work, too much effort, too much risk to enforce.  The end result  of all this avoidance is that we let everyone down…ourselves being accountable, and others for not holding them accountable.

Today’s society has become one of avoidance, passiveness, and enabling.  In short, people risk becoming soft emotionally, psychologically, intellectually, and physically.  As a result, anyone who tries to hold people accountable or is firm in their values is vilified.  Teachers no longer hold students accountable for behavior or grades.  A person is no longer “fat” he/she is “plus-sized.”  You can’t be “lazy” but you can be “unmotivated.”  Our society has tried to eliminate failure in an attempt to prevent any sort of perceived negative feeling.  As a result our society is at risk of becoming fat, lazy, stupid, and in denial.

The source issue here is that not enough people are willing to be the “Bad Guy.”  Being the bad guy takes an awful lot of work, and makes a person a target for all of the vitriol that comes from people who do not want to have to be responsible.  In short, the issue is accountability.  The good news is that the “Ultimate Good Guy” was the “Bad Guy.”  Jesus is the model of accountability.  He held others accountable, and He surrounded Himself with people who questioned Him.  Sometimes we view Christ’s disciples who questioned with disdain and scorn:
Jesus Anointed at Bethany (Matthew 26)
⁶ While Jesus was in Bethany in the home of Simon the Leper, ⁷a woman came to him with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, which she poured on his head as he was reclining at the table.
⁸ When the disciples saw this, they were indignant. “Why this waste?” they asked. ⁹ “This perfume could have been sold at a high price and the money given to the poor.”
¹⁰ Aware of this, Jesus said to them, “Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me. ¹¹ The poor you will always have with you,but you will not always have me. ¹² When she poured this perfume on my body, she did it to prepare me for burial. ¹³ Truly I tell you, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.”
This question, while appearing selfish and naive, indeed well-intentioned.  The disciples are not afraid to look at Jesus and say “why?”  In return Christ responds to them, and teaches them.  He holds them accountable, just as God held Jesus accountable.  Every day I teach in a classroom with one of the best teachers in the country.  Each day she challenges me to grow.  She holds me accountable to the decisions I make and the plans I construct.  In addition, I have friends who hold me accountable for my behavior, and I love them for doing so. 

Ultimately I am lucky.  I have people in my life who care more about ME than being MY FRIEND.  They hold my best interests as a priority over “being cool,” and as a result, I am held accountable by them.  And you know what…I love them for it.  I have begun to recognize the positive impact of their holding me accountable has had on my life.  I am making better decisions, treating people better, and I am taking better care of myself.  All because I have people in my life who care enough to hold me accountable.

Are you accountable?  Have you surrounded yourself with people who love you enough to hold you accountable?  Do you love the people around you enough to help Gracefully hold them accountable?  Are you humble enough to accept their accountability with grace?  Jesus did and was.  I pray that I can someday handle accountability as well as He did.  And I pray the same thing for you.

Romans 14:12
So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.

One Love
One God
One Way

Jason

What Does a Potential Christian Look Like…

I have been struggling lately with an old issue.  I firmly believe in stereotypes.  Not the kind that we use to pigeonhole people into racial, gender and socio-economic boxes.  But stereotypes are a tool we use every day when we venture into public.  At first glance, you can make an educated guess about someone’s profession, personality, or mood.  Those guesses are stereotypes, and we use them to facilitate interaction with the world around us.  The key to stereotypes and preconceived notions is not to use them in a negative way, and that is oftentimes, way too easy.

I have been the focus of stereotypes most of my adult life.  I don’ t look like a “typical” English teacher.  I should have played football.  I probably listen to country music.  I don’t look like I should have a tattoo.  And for the most part, I am fine with those broad, sweeping assumptions.  But in the last few weeks an issue I struggled with early in my Christian faith has come back to revisit me.  I see an awful lot of Christians who have a heart to minister to those who are not Christians, but they have a very narrow view of what those people should look like…them.  This is particularly disturbing to me because I don’t look like today’s “typical” Christian, and that means, if I were not already a part of the fold, I would not be part of the “target” audience.

I do not wear skinny jeans, have styled hair or manicured fingernails.  I don’t wear throwback t-shirts or hipster attire.  I don’t wear pressed dress pants, a button up shirt and polished shoes on Sunday.  I don’t have a cool fedora or cabbie hat.  Nothing I wear, nor the build of my body fits the “stereotype” of what a “potential” Christian looks like.  And while I have no issue with people who choose those styles for themselves, I do have an issue when people assume that everyone who should be a Christian should look like that.  It is when we make these assumptions or reinforce these stereotypes that we begin to exclude people from the “club” that is Christianity.  More frightening is that by doing this, we are discouraging the very people who may be reaching out to us the most…who may need Jesus the most.

I am in no way perfect or above reproach when it comes to enforcing stereotypes.  In fact, in writing the above, I did just that.  But the challenge for me and you is to keep an open mind.  I roll into church Sunday mornings in a big-tired pickup, bumping loud music, wearing jeans and a t-shirt.  If I can be a Christian, how many more people around you could be too?  How many more won’t like to listen to worship music as their primary musical entertainment?  How many more will like to drink beer?  How many more won’t necessarily fit the Christian stereotype, but will need the love of Jesus?

So we need to keep our minds open.  We need to remember that not everyone dresses or acts just like us.  Not everyone listens to the same music or watches the same television.  But in the end, we all need Jesus, no matter if we dress up on Sundays or wear Jack Daniels attire.

Mark 2:15-17

¹⁵ While Jesus was having dinner at Levi’s house, many tax collectors and sinners were eating with him and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. ¹⁶ When the teachers of the law who were Pharisees saw him eating with the sinners and tax collectors, they asked his disciples: “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?”

¹⁷ On hearing this, Jesus said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Matthew 5:14-16

¹⁴ “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. ¹⁵ Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. ¹⁶ In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

A Tough Reminder…

I have been a terrible blogger in the last several months.  My lame excuse is that it is a product of being blessed with a great job that keeps me hopping.  While that may be part of it, the other part of the truth is that I have just been too lazy.

Tonight I cannot blame busyness.  I am confined to my home after another trip to the doctor.  It seems that about the time I start forgetting Who I should be dependent on, He reminds me in some not-so-subtle way.  I am grateful for this, though I really wish I would get the hint and be a little more aware of my continued need for His wonderful grace and love.

God tends to use some really challenging times in a person’s life to help them redefine center.  I spent this morning experiencing some excellent care at Avera McKennan while undergoing an Upper Endoscopy, and tonight I await the results of the biopsies the doctor took.  He is probably going to tell me that I need to lay off the pizza and eat more fiber, but while I await those results, my crazy imagination (and questionable medical history) can’t help but think of the “what ifs.”

Some people are never faced with a “what if” moment.  They are never backed into a corner where they have to decide what is important to them, never had all the illusions of life stripped away leaving only the ONE truth left.  I am one of the lucky ones.  I have been there, and I know that when everything is stripped away, my God is there waiting for me.  Sometimes I need a reminder of that.  Sometimes I start to believe that I can do it on my own.  But just as He has always done, He reminds me that He has always been there for me. Psalm 46:1 “God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble.”

So while I go to sleep tonight with a touch of worry in my head, I know in my heart that I have nothing to fear.  I know that no matter what the results are, that my God is watching over me.  I know that He loves me.  I know that He will take care of me just as He has done so, so many times before.  He is my rock…is He yours?

2 Samuel 22:47 “The lord lives! Praise be to my Rock! Exalted be my God, the Rock, my Savior!”

Beyond the Superficial Thanks…

It is now officially 12::47 on the morning of Thanksgiving.  I am sitting at my counter marveling at the activity that has taken place in my house this week.  On Saturday, six family members from Tennessee arrived to spend a week in South Dakota leading up to Thanksgiving.  It has been a crazy, busy, awesome week.  Today I learned that the weather was keeping several of my relatives from making the trip from Spearfish, and I was quite disappointed.  But the more I thought about it, the less emotional I became.

You see, each Thanksgiving, we are incessantly asked what we are thankful for in our lives.  And each year, we offer some superficial response.  We are always thankful for…family, friends, health, finances, whatever.  While these are very important things to be thankful for, I wonder if they have not become automatic responses to a question we REALLY need to think about.  Beyond what we are thankful for, who are we thankful to?

Hebrews 12:28 (New International Version)
²⁸ Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe.”^[a]

I am thankful for an awful lot of things.  I am now healthy, and there have been times when I really have not been.  I have stability, and I lived some of my life without it.  My family is doing well, and there have been times when they have not.  And while I am thankful for all of these things, many of us do not specify to whom we are thankful.

Today as you celebrate the day of Thanksgiving, remember not only what you are thankful for, and why you are thankful, but also to whom your thanks should be directed.

I thank God for my family.  I thank Him for my brother.  I am grateful that he brought my family from Tennessee to my doorstep safely.  I thank God for giving the rest of my family the good sense to stay home when travel would have been unwise.  I am grateful that my friend Eric is recovering.  I thank God every time I wake up, because there was a time when I was not sure of how many mornings I had left.

I pray today that you are blessed beyond counting.  I pray that when asked what you are thankful for, that you cannot number the ways.  And I pray that when you give thanks today at the table with your family, friends, or even by yourself, that you remember who to give thanks to.

Colossians 3:15
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.

One Love
One God
One Way